Said It Here

How to save money when your parents have access to your bank account

Minors and young adults often have joint bank accounts tied to controlling parents who take their earned money without permission. Because parents retain legal access, accumulated savings can be drained constantly, leaving young earners with no safe way to store their cash.

Overview
People affected4 accounts across 1 forum
Workarounds found9 items attempted
Community agreement168 total upvotes

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

Found another way around this?

Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.

  1. 1
    Using cash tips as personal spending money and depositing paychecks into savings
    Did this help you?
  2. 2
    Cashing paychecks and using a physical savings envelope or book system
    Did this help you?
  3. 3
    Opening a separate bank account with an older sibling that the mother does not know about
    Did this help you?
  4. 4
    considering saving up for a Honda Element, living in it and cutting them off
    Did this help you?
  5. 5
    planning to change banks this week
    Did this help you?
  6. 6
    considering negotiating a fixed monthly rent contribution instead of random withdrawals
    Did this help you?
  7. 7
    Cutting financial ties and refusing to provide future money
    Did this help you?
  8. 8
    Asking the account holder to return a portion of the contributed funds voluntarily
    Did this help you?
  9. 9
    Opening a separate account under one's own control for future contributions
    Did this help you?
Tried another approach not listed above?+ Share your workaround ↑

In their words

Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.

r/personalfinance4 people · September 2026

“my mom has been “borrowing money” since I’ve gotten a job. It’s just frustrating because I save and do everything right but my financially incompetent mother will take everything eventually”source ↗

“It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even count anymore, all I know it’s over 15k.”source ↗

“I’m getting to a breaking point because it’s almost every other day she takes money.”source ↗

Beneficial_Repair450 · r/personalfinance · 150 upvotes

“My dad came to me asking for help because I am the only person he knows who has opened a 529 plan - I have two set up for my godsons. But I am hardly an expert. I know that she will be penalized with 10% + income taxes on the earnings but not the contributions. I don't think that he can prevent her from taking the money out.”source ↗

“Now she's thinking of raiding those accounts to pay off some of her medical and credit card debt she accrued after she needed another surgery and was out of work during her recovery.”source ↗

“My dad is furious and he wants to prevent her from taking the money out.”source ↗

DragonflyNo332 · r/personalfinance · 89 upvotes

“I like the idea of saving my cash because my mom is narcissistic and I do not want her to see how much money I have. It’s also unfortunate because she can control my money with the bank I’m under her with.”source ↗

Melodic_Sherbet8855 · r/personalfinance · 1 upvotes

“She has access to my bank account for some reason. I think when I was a minor she had joint made it so she’s just taking it. I don’t even send it. She doesn’t even ask anymore.”source ↗

Beneficial_Repair450 · r/personalfinance · 1 upvotes

“I’ve tried to explain this to my in-laws. They like to give money to my kids and I am grateful for it but I have tried to get them to open their own 529 for my kids. 1.) They should get the tax break for what they put in. 2.) That way we all know it will go to the kids no matter what (or they can roll into their own IRA if needed and I suspect it will be)”source ↗

teeksquad · r/personalfinance · 1 upvotes

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised