How to choose between a big career move and your relationship?
An ultimatum from a partner forces a choice between pursuing a major relocation opportunity or staying behind to keep the relationship intact. This conflict leaves people feeling trapped and fearing that choosing one path will permanently ruin their future.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
- 1breaking up with the partner to take the relocation opportunity
- 2staying in the current location to keep the relationship intact
- 3attempting long distance
- 4Planning another visit to the city during the winter to test if the partner's interest is serious
- 5Weighing private sector employment against staying in a stable government career path
- 6Considering staying put to gain promotions and save money
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“So i’ve received this amazing opportunity to move to pittsburgh PA… But i’m not sure if i should go...”source ↗
“My boyfriend is so adamant on if i move there we break up but if i stay in alaska we stay together.”source ↗
“i love my partner so much but i don’t want to have to choose between pittsburgh or breaking up. i think im js cooked..”source ↗
“I am unsure how to approach this I would like to live in NYC but I also know my current situation is extremely rare and positive.”source ↗