Should I be in the room when my dog is put down?
Deciding whether to stay during euthanasia leaves a heavy emotional weight that can linger for months or even years afterward, whether you choose to be present or not. That lingering memory or haunting regret makes the aftermath feel isolating and deeply difficult to process.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
- 1Paying a veterinarian for home-euthanasia services
- 2Bringing familiar blankets, turning down lights, and playing music to create a calm environment
- 3letting surviving pets smell the deceased animal's body to help them understand
- 4giving surviving pets extra attention and grieving together
- 5snuggling and relying on other remaining pets for companionship
- 6trying laser treatments and joint medications
- 7pushing the pet around the house in a stroller
- 8holding food dishes up and hand-feeding
- 9seeking comfort and validation from online communities
- 10Reaching out to online communities for support
- 11Leaving the pet carrier and unused supplies at the vet clinic
- 12Channeling grief into loving other pets
- 13watching old videos and listening to recordings of the pet
- 14Trying multiple rounds of veterinary treatments, medications, and emergency room visits
- 15tracking good days versus bad days on a calendar
- 16using quality of life checklists provided by veterinarians
- 17consulting vets for in-home euthanasia services
- 18pampering the pet with special last meals or treats
- 19spending all possible time cuddling, giving treats, and taking pictures
- 20taking the pet outside to safely enjoy the breeze and sun
- 21seeking emotional support and shared experiences from others who have gone through pet loss
- 22reassuring oneself that the decision ended suffering rather than life
- 23focusing on positive memories and celebrating the pet's life
- 24venting emotions and seeking validation from online communities of other pet owners
- 25venting and seeking support online
- 26snuggling and spending precious time with the pet
- 27pursuing available tests and treatments
- 28Asking about payment plans or veterinary credit options
- 29spoiling the pet with treats and special foods before the appointment
- 30seeking palliative care or medical treatments
- 31focusing on providing a peaceful and dignified end
- 32feeding unusual foods like tuna
- 33providing heated blankets and cat TV
- 34taking the pet outside for sensory experiences
- 35Seeking reassurance from others online
- 36Trying to remember that the vet recommended it due to suffering
- 37Allowing time to pass and trying not to let guilt consume them
- 38continuing with pain relief and arranging for PTS
- 39Waiting to see if medications like cortisone or pain relievers help
- 40Seeking second opinions from veterinarians
- 41Writing down feelings and taking videos to combat hindsight doubt
- 42posting on online support communities for comfort
- 43Re-framing the situation to focus on ending the animal's suffering
- 44Seeking reassurance and validation from online community members
- 45Consulting with a trusted veterinarian for blood tests and medical assessments
- 46Providing pain medication and treatments to maintain quality of life
- 47crying
- 48seeking emotional support from online communities
- 49focusing on making memories and loving them to the end
In their words
Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.
“Making this decision is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”source ↗
“I’m looking for any reason to not have to do this. But she can’t walk, can’t eat. I never wanted this for her. She is the best thing that ever happened to me, and I need to do my best to make sure she’s not suffering.”source ↗
“I took my boy Dean for a checkup, and I too came home with an empty carrier.”source ↗
“I took her to the vet to see if it was time to put her down because she was suffering and they denied the procedure and then she went in her sleep less than 24 hours later.”source ↗
“I've had the cat for exactly half of my life and she had a really good run.”source ↗
“So I came home with an empty car carrier after going in for what I thought was something simple.”source ↗
“My girl had to be put down suddenly while I am out of the country, the vet found fluid in her lungs and a tumour.”source ↗
“I am just distraught and in tears knowing that I couldnt be with her in her last moments.”source ↗
“My boy did this when his brother passed. He would also walk around the house crying out for him for about a week. Broke my heart everyday because they were so close.”source ↗
“Happened to me too. I just about died myself.”source ↗
“I didn't for my first dog as an adult. It's been over 10 years.”source ↗
“By morning he moved less and complained more, obviously gotten worse.”source ↗
“I agree and I did. But it's been six months and it still haunts me. Miss you buddy.”source ↗
“My sweetest girl, Aphrodite aka Didi was diagnosed with heart disease today.”source ↗
“We are doing every test and treatment we can but I'm just scared and sad and angry.”source ↗
“It all happened so quick and everyday I feel worse about it she was so sweet and kind and came to me for help and that was the end result.”source ↗
“Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Everyday feels worse and every time I go to the basement of my job I the pain comes back.”source ↗
“My wife's cat of 14 years, Garfield has cancer. Found out today. We have an appointment Wednesday to have him put to sleep. We are totally devastated.”source ↗
“Is this the right decision? Could we have done anything differently to help her?”source ↗
“Today I was brave enought to help my cat cross the rainbow bridge, it was something I'd been putting off for several weeks because I didn't know when the right time would be and I wanted to spend time with my sweet boy as long as possible.”source ↗
“Was it mine to make? I feel like I took away his life; what if he wanted to keep fighting and enjoying our moments together? I’m still in shock that he is not here anymore.”source ↗
“Im so scared putting him down was the wrong option and that I should’ve asked for more tests maybe it was a wrong diagnosis and he had something else”source ↗
“Fry's time is coming soon. He has a mass on a kidney, not eating much and dehydrated even though he is drinking a lot of water. Any options would be too risky due to his age condition.”source ↗
“I'm sorry I can't do more to help you.”source ↗
“I miss him every day. Sometimes I open these old videos just to hear him, see him moving around, and remember what it felt like when he was still here.”source ↗
“I don't think I have fully processed what happened yet.”source ↗
“Wednesday morning I am going to have to say goodbye to him as the vets will be taking his pain away. I feel sick, I can’t sleep, I know he has had an amazing life and lived to a great age but my god this is so awful and hard.”source ↗
“How do you cope? How am I supposed to hold myself together in the vets on Wednesday morning?”source ↗
“If in the next two days I can't get the diarrhea to stop I'm going to have to make the decision to either try and wait out the rest of this terrible storm or let her go before it all gets bad again.”source ↗
“I'm just having trouble reconciling the idea of putting her down when she looks to be improving.”source ↗
“I don't know what to do. My head and my heart are telling me different things.”source ↗
“My dog is a 14yo Great Pyrenees mix and I'm struggling to make the decision.”source ↗
“perhaps I'm being selfish by not wanting to lose him, and maybe I should let him go. That worries me. Even though the vet says he's doing fine, I don't want him to suffer.”source ↗
“i am definitely in so much pain. i wouldn’t mind hearing from someone who had a strong emotional bond with their kitty. i have always felt alone in this and it hurts really bad.”source ↗
“A sudden terminal illness is heart breaking as a pet owner.”source ↗
“My cat is being put down on Thursday, what can I do to make her last few days good?”source ↗
“Decision to euthanise? Please help.”source ↗
“We are so torn and heartbroken as we feel the vets rushed us in to booking massive surgery and adding more medications on and we feel that enough is enough with him.”source ↗
“I really struggled with this with my boy last year he was 17. You don't really get over it.”source ↗
“Each time I struggle with the same feelings that you’re struggling with now. And each time I feel like I’m making a mistake…”source ↗
“I feel extremely guilty about potentially putting him down. Does anyone have advice or have been in this position?”source ↗
“I know for my cats they would love extra treats, real fish, playing cat TV all day long, and a heated blanket to cuddle on.”source ↗
“Give her attention. Pets, tell her you love her, she’ll understand.”source ↗
“This made me so sad I lost one of my babies around 3 weeks old she was so small I called her berry may they rest eternally making biscuits 🫶🏼”source ↗
“I scrambled her to an emergency vet and paid their $700 ransom for bloodwork only to find out she had feline leukemia and only a week or two to live.”source ↗
“I put down my best friend in January. Easily the worst pain I’ve ever experienced.”source ↗
“I was overwhelmed when it fell to me to have to be the one to make the decision to kill him.”source ↗
“I thought our poor old Marty had an abscess tooth. Turned out to be mouth cancer. We were devastated.”source ↗
“Awww take her outside, let her smell everything”source ↗
“My cat has breast cancer too. Its tearing me up inside to see her like that . Her sister died last year of the same thing still havent got over it. U gotta make the Decision if she is in pain to end her suffering.”source ↗
“This is the hardest decision I've ever made and I can't accept that I have to make it.”source ↗
“While our old girl is eating (she has always loved to eat!) and going potty outside, she is struggling big time.”source ↗
“It's the HARDEST decision ever, I feel for you. I have been there several times. In looking back, with my first dog, she started declining at 15 and her quality of life wasn't great. I saw later I was holding on for me, not her. And I wished I had let her go sooner.”source ↗
“Unfortunately, I waited too long because I kept thinking he was still having enough good days, and he ended up having a fairly traumatic end.”source ↗