Microwave turns on and rotates but doesn't heat food

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

1. 1
   Testing internal components like fuses, capacitors, diodes, and magnetrons with a multimeter
2. 2
   Measuring power consumption and voltage across relay coils
3. 3
   Inspecting and cleaning door switches and terminals for grease buildup
4. 4
   Unplugging the microwave and replacing it
5. 5
   Using the stove instead

In their words

Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.