Said It Here

Older cat still hissing at new kitten after months

Even when cats can peacefully stay together in the same space, lingering hissing, growling, and lunging can persist for months without escalating into true aggression. This behavior often stabilizes into a permanent tolerance rather than a close bond, leaving owners questioning whether the cats are simply a bad match or if normal adjustment is still happening.

Overview
People affected18 accounts across 1 forum
Workarounds found53 items attempted
Community agreement154 total upvotes

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

53 items+ Contribute

Found another way around this?

Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.

  1. 1
    Keeping the cats in separate rooms most of the day
    3 people mentioned
    Did this help you?
  2. 2
    separating the cats
    2 people mentioned
    Did this help you?
  3. 3
    Giving the older cat high places and personal space to retreat to
    Did this help you?
  4. 4
    Redirecting the kitten when it gets too annoying
    Did this help you?
  5. 5
    Using soothing pheromones like Feliway
    Did this help you?
  6. 6
    Waiting for months or up to a year for them to adjust
    Did this help you?
  7. 7
    Feeding cats on opposite sides of a closed door
    Did this help you?
  8. 8
    Holding both cats simultaneously to keep them in proximity
    Did this help you?
  9. 9
    Using a temporary cat net or baby gate
    Did this help you?
  10. 10
    Opening the door slightly while blocking it with a heavy object
    Did this help you?
  11. 11
    Buying more toys
    Did this help you?
  12. 12
    Separating the cats and doing scent swaps
    Did this help you?
  13. 13
    Feeding them on opposite sides of a closed door
    Did this help you?
  14. 14
    Conducting slow, controlled play sessions with treats
    Did this help you?
  15. 15
    Using plug-in pheromone diffusers
    Did this help you?
  16. 16
    Giving each cat individual attention and alone time
    Did this help you?
  17. 17
    Start with scent before face to face meeting by introducing each cat's scent on a piece of clothing separately.
    Did this help you?
  18. 18
    Keep cats completely separated on the same floor for about two weeks.
    Did this help you?
  19. 19
    leaving the younger cat outside during blizzards and hoping to let him in for the winter
    Did this help you?
  20. 20
    considering contacting a shelter
    Did this help you?
  21. 21
    Keep the kitten in a separate spare room with necessities like a litter box, food, water, and bedding when left alone.
    Did this help you?
  22. 22
    Allow the cats to interact only when someone is present to supervise.
    Did this help you?
  23. 23
    Wiping the kittens down with a wet wipe to remove strange clinic smells
    Did this help you?
  24. 24
    Rubbing hand towels on the kittens and then on the resident cat to transfer and mix scents
    Did this help you?
  25. 25
    Using short bursts of supervised time together
    Did this help you?
  26. 26
    Scent swapping using blankets
    Did this help you?
  27. 27
    Following the Jackson Galaxy introduction method
    Did this help you?
  28. 28
    Using a mesh screen divider between rooms
    Did this help you?
  29. 29
    Intervening to redirect the kitten's energy toward toys
    Did this help you?
  30. 30
    Adding cat shelves and escape routes around the cat tree
    Did this help you?
  31. 31
    Allowing the interaction to continue if it appears safe
    Did this help you?
  32. 32
    doing slow scent swapping with towels and room rotations
    Did this help you?
  33. 33
    using barrier meetings with carriers or partially open doors
    Did this help you?
  34. 34
    feeding them together
    Did this help you?
  35. 35
    using cat pheromone plug-ins
    Did this help you?
  36. 36
    giving them time to figure each other out
    Did this help you?
  37. 37
    re-directing the persistent cat to other toys or activities
    Did this help you?
  38. 38
    playing more with the energetic cat
    Did this help you?
  39. 39
    allowing time and doing separation or isolation
    Did this help you?
  40. 40
    Doing scent swapping with items
    Did this help you?
  41. 41
    Allowing the kitten to explore the common space
    Did this help you?
  42. 42
    Feeding them with a closed door between them
    Did this help you?
  43. 43
    sending the kitten to stay with a friend
    Did this help you?
  44. 44
    considering rehoming the kitten
    Did this help you?
  45. 45
    Separating the kitten into another room when the older cats get annoyed
    Did this help you?
  46. 46
    Introducing the cats gradually in steps so they get used to the new scent
    Did this help you?
  47. 47
    Trying to manually tire out the hyperactive kitten with play
    Did this help you?
  48. 48
    Giving them more time to figure the hierarchy out naturally
    Did this help you?
  49. 49
    Keeping them in completely separate rooms initially
    Did this help you?
  50. 50
    Scent swapping blankets before face-to-face meetings
    Did this help you?
  51. 51
    Using snacks and food as positive reinforcement
    Did this help you?
  52. 52
    Letting them sort it out without micromanaging interactions
    Did this help you?
  53. 53
    Playing with the cats at a visual distance to build positive associations
    Did this help you?
Tried another approach not listed above?+ Share your workaround ↑

In their words

Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.

r/cats18 people · September 2026 – October 2026

“My Persian kitten (6 months, female) seemed really lonely, so I decided to adopt another kitten.”source ↗

“she and my Persian are NOT getting along at all. They keep fighting.”source ↗

“My Persian has changed a lot. She never really liked being touched or picked up, but she used to play with us, run around, and be really active. Now she mostly just sits there and eats. She seems genuinely upset and withdrawn.”source ↗

“It’s been about 4 weeks and I really thought they would eventually bond or at least tolerate each other by now.”source ↗

Broad-Fan-6934 · r/cats · 34 upvotes

“Lily, however, is terrified of him. She hisses at me if she smells him on me.”source ↗

“I let him in twice and both times it took her 3 days to get over seeing him asleep in her home.. she hides, growls, stops eating. The first time she actually lunged at him to attack.”source ↗

azbrez · r/cats · 21 upvotes

“My apartment doesn't allow me to change stuff and I can't really buy a screen door or something like that at the moment, I have the cage but I feel bad putting one of them into the cage to show them to each other.”source ↗

Rc-1138-Boss · r/cats · 20 upvotes

“Older cat still hissing/growling at kitten after 2+ months – but they can also peacefully stay together. Will this improve?”source ↗

“I’m not sure if what I’m seeing is still normal or if these two just aren’t a good match.”source ↗

Steppi-Nick · r/cats · 14 upvotes

“His dilute calico girl HATES my black and white boy. So of course, she is the ONLY one he wants to play with.”source ↗

“But he will chase her, roll over around her, meow constantly at her - and she is just not having it. Why, oh why does he ONLY want to engage with the one that detests him?? 😭”source ↗

bepisnconk · r/cats · 11 upvotes

“I’m just wondering if anyone has any suggestions. Should we wait for his hissing to stop? What else can we do to make him more comfortable?”source ↗

New_Fun_9495 · r/cats · 10 upvotes

“Whenever he sees the new kitten, he runs away or hisses and runs away to hide... while the kitten doesn't seem that bothered by his presence.”source ↗

“I honestly didn't expect him to react this way, I hope that with slow , gradual exposure he'll get used to her being here....”source ↗

“Any advice how to my silly boy so he's not scared of the little baby?”source ↗

Fourteas · r/cats · 9 upvotes

“The play itself doesn’t look aggressive but the noises Luna makes are what bother me. Is she mouthy or is she annoyed and we need to intervene?”source ↗

SticklerMrMeeseeks1 · r/cats · 9 upvotes

“i don’t know where to go from here and i really want them to get along soon so they can both be out playing! :(”source ↗

DaisyMwah · r/cats · 7 upvotes

“Olive the OG cat (4yrs) continues to hiss even while they play. She's not bitched up in any way- coat is flat, ears are up, tail is playful. She rarely hissed before he came into the house. Has anyone encountered this before? Is this just the way it is now?”source ↗

yarnfrog42 · r/cats · 6 upvotes

“We have been feeding them together for about two weeks and there’s no real improvement on her demeanor. She generally hisses and growls at him then leaves”source ↗

“she hates him going near it and seems to resource guard it by sitting in front of it and hissing at him.”source ↗

“What else can we be doing or do differently to encourage her to accept him?”source ↗

OmegaloIz · r/cats · 6 upvotes

“My wife and I brought home a kitten a couple months ago and our two cats won't stop fighting with him.”source ↗

“The kitten is hyperactive so he constantly wants to play and despite our best efforts we can't tire him out and he'll take his energy out on the other cats who want nothing to do with him.”source ↗

“They fight and hiss at him multiple times a day, not sure what options we have to help calm everyone down.”source ↗

Jkazz21 · r/cats · 5 upvotes

“I have no idea how to do this and neither does my dad.”source ↗

twiggy_panda_712 · r/cats · 4 upvotes

“I'm dealing with this currently with my tuxie boy and pastel calico. She absolutely detests him and unfortunately he goes near her wanting to play and she's not having it.”source ↗

NebulaRFA · r/cats · 3 upvotes

“Any interaction between them ends up in fur flying, hissing, growling, and he doesnt understand her language - she doesnt understand his.”source ↗

“Last week it all came to a head - baby C’s mouth was wonky af and i took her to the vet. She had lost a canine and was very swollen.”source ↗

“I feel like such a terrible mother for both of them but i can also see that my baby C is not thriving with the kitten, at all.”source ↗

bripsen · r/cats · 2 upvotes

“My boyfriend’s cat is the same way. When I moved in with my cat, she HATED him. still does, but she can tolerate his presence.”source ↗

AirCompetitive464 · r/cats · 1 upvotes

“I bought the kittens back home from the vet and now my 6 year old cat is being very aggressive and mean to the kittens.”source ↗

“My older cat is even lashing out at us. Any advice?”source ↗

cbottigliere · r/cats · 1 upvotes

“I bring her downstairs when during the day but he avoids her like a plague.”source ↗

“I'm just surprised that the boy feels intimidated by a creature ten times smaller than him!”source ↗

Fourteas · r/cats · 1 upvotes

“That kitten is not listening to Lunas vocalizations to leave her alone. She does not want to play , and that kitten is going to keep harassing her if you don't redirect her or tired her out with playing with something that isn't your cat who just wants to be left alone.”source ↗

liv-livs · r/cats · 1 upvotes

“Luna is literally backed into a corner with her only escape route being blocked by a kitten who is not regarding her growling clearly in displeasure”source ↗

liv-livs · r/cats · 1 upvotes

“if i let them out at the same time they just fight each other ! it’s making me so sad :(”source ↗

DaisyMwah · r/cats · 1 upvotes

“I was told to keep the new one in a separate room but she was meowing the whole time so I left the door open.”source ↗

Broad-Fan-6934 · r/cats

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised