Said It Here

How to say no to parents asking for money

Parents often pressure adult children for financial support to avoid crises like eviction, leaving children trapped between funding parental instability and saving for their own independence. This dynamic creates an overwhelming sense of obligation that makes it extremely difficult to refuse requests without feeling responsible for the resulting fallout.

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

  1. 1
    Offering to pay bills relating to siblings directly instead of giving cash to parents
  2. 2
    Giving money whenever requested
  3. 3
    Offering a smaller amount than what was asked

In their words

Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.

My mom has asked to “borrow” $500 additional for rent for 2 months repeatedly now (which i doubt she will repay if shes already always short).source ↗

Since I am not ready to move out yet should I give her it to prevent being evicted again?source ↗

Should I pay the extra $500/month so I have longer to save?source ↗

ProfessionalOwl8660 · r/personalfinance · 189 upvotes

I feel I cannot say no to her.source ↗

I dont love the feeling of being in a position I cant say no.source ↗

And I feel I cant say no. Since then what? she goes into debt? or worse?source ↗

IronIndigo · r/personalfinance · 57 upvotes

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised