Why does our cat only like one of us?
Newly adopted cats often attach themselves exclusively to a single household member while running away from or acting hostile toward others. This leaves the excluded partner unable to cuddle, sleep with, or share normal affection with the pet, creating tension and self-doubt about whether the cat dislikes them.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
- 1Having the rejected partner be the exclusive dispenser of treats like Churu
- 2Accepting the cat's personality quirk and respecting its boundaries regarding being picked up
- 3Waiting for the cat to adjust over time using the 3-3-3 rule
- 4Feeding the cat and giving it treats
- 5Playing with the cat and giving it attention while working remotely
- 6Trying to ignore the cat more during the day so it comes around
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“He for whatever reason bonded tightly to me(M36), but not my gf, he runs from her, and sometimes gets a little mad when she holds him.”source ↗
“now it never cuddles/sleeps with me. Advice?😔”source ↗
“We can’t afford another cat right now with our current budget. And even if we did, there’s no guarantees the same thing wouldn’t happen again. 😞”source ↗
“The thing is, he’s fine sleeping with my husband in the bed and cuddling up on top of him.”source ↗
“Does he not like me maybe? He has no problem sleeping with my husband”source ↗