Said It Here

Toddler suddenly refuses usual babysitter and acts out

A child can suddenly become reactive, unkind, and refuse to let a long-time afternoon caregiver come over. This leaves parents feeling completely at a loss, overwhelmed by daily tantrums, and anxious that others might misjudge their parenting.

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

  1. 1
    Talking to the child about unkind behavior and needing quiet after school
  2. 2
    Texting the babysitter to apologize and ask for ideas on how to help
  3. 3
    Not spanking
  4. 4
    Using timeouts
  5. 5
    Gentle talking
  6. 6
    Disengaging
  7. 7
    Carrying her out kicking and screaming while getting the baby sibling in the car

In their words

Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.

r/Parenting2 people · September 2026

“I am genuinely at a loss here and would love some input. We have had the same afternoon sitter (not a pro nanny, she’s good with him but doesn’t have a childcare background to manage this) for 2 years now and within the last couple weeks my son has just decided he doesn’t want her to come and is really reactive about it.”source ↗

ScrambledWithCheese · r/Parenting · 1 upvotes

“I have a 3.5 year old that almost seems to hate me. She is my oldest and doesn’t like me to touch her, play with her, cuddle her etc.”source ↗

“He gets Friday-Sunday off and when he goes back to work on Monday she throws these crazy tantrums all day. Hitting me kicking me throwing things at me.”source ↗

“I just don’t know what to do with her anymore.”source ↗

“I’m scared people are going to start thinking I’m abusive to her with this strong reaction.”source ↗

theprettyseawitch · r/Parenting

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised