Why does my kid refuse to say hello or goodbye?
Young children often suddenly stop responding to social greetings, leaving parents stuck trying to constantly model and prompt good manners to no avail. This resistance can make social interactions awkward and leaves parents unsure how to handle the sudden change without constant nagging.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
Found another way around this?
Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.
- 1Letting it slide and hoping the child picks it up eventuallyDid this help you?
- 2Greeting the child and other people to model normal behavior without pressuring the childDid this help you?
- 3Not mentioning the lack of greetings for a couple of months to see if it resolves itselfDid this help you?
- 4Doing role play at homeDid this help you?
- 5Correcting the child and telling them to just say hiDid this help you?
- 6Waiting for the child to eventually warm up and grow out of itDid this help you?
- 7letting the child be and not forcing greetingsDid this help you?
- 8talking to the child about mannersDid this help you?
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“when she was 4-5, that kind of all stopped. when people say hi or bye, it seems hard for her to do that.”source ↗
“Sounds like my kid. I keep asking her to say hi/bye and show example, to teach her some manners, but usually she won't do it.”source ↗
“he avoids interaction with strangers at times. He will sometimes talk with them given time but if, let's say, we find someone in the street that interacts with him, he just says "no" or "i don't like it" and hides.”source ↗
“I’ve had a few situations recently where other kids from his class are calling ‘hi x!’ Or ‘bye x!’ Repeatedly. And he just ignores them or does this teeny tiny wave and when I tell him to say hi he gets cross with me and says ‘look I was waving!’”source ↗
“I worry it’s going to set him back socially.”source ↗
Where this came up
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