Said It Here

How to deal with a family member who constantly complains about money

This dynamic typically happens because the person wants a sympathetic listener rather than actual financial solutions, while continuing to spend money on frivolous things. Absorbing endless complaints about being broke while they ignore advice leads to exhaustion and resentment.

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

  1. 1
    ignoring them and not engaging in the topic
  2. 2
    setting boundaries and telling them you prefer not to discuss money issues
  3. 3
    laughing internally and letting it go
  4. 4
    asking if they want a solution or just someone to listen
  5. 5
    pulling away a bit from the relationship

In their words

Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.

I realize that they are never going to listen to me and I am tired of nonstop complaints about not having money while in the same breath telling me about how they are spending money on frivolous things.source ↗

Anyone else have a family member or friend like this and what did you do?source ↗

claudiatiedemann · r/personalfinance · 9 upvotes

My sister is like this also. You'll have to ask her if she wants a solution or just someone to listen.source ↗

Beneficial-Rent-9663 · r/personalfinance · 1 upvotes

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised