Baby cries hysterically whenever I put them down
Babies with extreme separation anxiety cry hysterically and start coughing the moment a parent moves more than a few inches away, forcing constant holding. This relentless neediness drains parents physically and emotionally, leaving them with chronic physical strain and a feeling that nothing works.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
Found another way around this?
Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.
- 1Baby-wearing or carrying the child into every roomDid this help you?
- 2Placing the baby in a bouncer nearby while doing choresDid this help you?
- 3Playing peek-a-boo and practicing brief separationsDid this help you?
- 4trying to distract the child with toys, books, or household itemsDid this help you?
- 5giving verbal warnings before standing up or leavingDid this help you?
- 6Using daily evening baths to ease bedtimeDid this help you?
- 7Buying a very soft changing station and positioning the baby higher for comfortDid this help you?
- 8Experimenting with back carriers for young babiesDid this help you?
- 9Visiting only fully enclosed playgrounds with high fences when alone with both childrenDid this help you?
- 10Setting up engaging independent activities for the toddler at home, such as water play, clothing parties, or trying on adult shoesDid this help you?
- 11Baby-wearing with wraps or carriers like a Moby or Ergo facing inwardDid this help you?
- 12wearing the baby in a carrierDid this help you?
- 13letting the baby cry in order to get tasks done or eatDid this help you?
- 14using a backpack carrierDid this help you?
- 15baby wearingDid this help you?
- 16letting the baby fuss for a bit using headphonesDid this help you?
- 17giving toys (though the baby quickly gets bored of them)Did this help you?
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“My 8 month old baby girl is extremely needy, she has always been. She constantly wants to be held or right next to me.”source ↗
“She will hysterically cry and she won’t stop. She will cry so hard that she starts coughing.”source ↗
“The hysterical crying is what’s really getting to us.”source ↗
“I had my third baby 7.5 months ago and since day one she needs constant attention. I keep thinking it’ll get better with each milestone but she is literally never content.”source ↗
“It’s like she hates being a baby and is only happy if I’m constantly pacing the house holding her.”source ↗
“It’s wearing me down to the point where I am getting frustrated with her and I know she can’t help it.”source ↗
“If your second baby was a Velcro baby, what was your experience like having a Velcro baby and a toddler?”source ↗
“If I’m more than 18 inches away my 8 month old has hysterics. Every. Single. Time.”source ↗
“My back was all knots for years. It is hard. Nothing worked.”source ↗
“My almost 15 month old has been extraordinarily clingy with me from 4 months and onwards.”source ↗
“My daughter from 4 months has never allowed me to put her down without a fight.”source ↗
“Im overwhelmed for the most part and finding it really hard to cope with this behaviour.”source ↗
“It’s very hard.”source ↗
“I feel like I’m losing my mind here. I have 3 kids and my youngest is seriously NEVER content.”source ↗
“She hates the floor and any type of baby container. I have to let her cry to get anything done or even feed myself.”source ↗
“More than thinking I was doing everything wrong the whole time only to realize some babies are just extremely harder than others.”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 15Why won't my baby eat meals or sleep for naps?
- 8Baby won't stop screeching all day
- 5How to keep a crawling baby safely contained while doing chores
- 6Why does my baby scream nonstop every evening?
- 13How to cope with an intense, high-needs toddler
- 5How to handle a child who constantly demands attention and talks nonstop?