Said It Here

Having second thoughts after paying a wedding vendor deposit

Paying a non-refundable retainer locks couples into a vendor before they have fully weighed their options or read subsequent reviews. This sudden doubt leaves them anxious about losing thousands of dollars or being stuck with unreliable service right before the wedding.

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

  1. 1
    Stick with the currently booked vendor and communicate specific desired shots
  2. 2
    Switch to the preferred vendor despite losing the initial retainer fee
  3. 3
    Book a second photographer and let the original vendor show up anyway since they do not offer refunds.
  4. 4
    Proceeding with the higher quote to maintain a good relationship with a preferred mechanic
  5. 5
    Canceling the service and risking the relationship with the regular shop to save money

In their words

Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.

r/weddingplanning2 people · September 2026

Paid the 50% retainer fee ($2kusd) already but currently having second thoughts.source ↗

I’m having such a big dilemma.source ↗

I just wished I slowed down a little and thought more about it.source ↗

Frosty_Author5512 · r/weddingplanning · 1 upvotes

So put wedding is a month out and we booked peony luxe over a year ago, we’ve completely paid but now I’ve found a lot of bad reviews and posts about them.source ↗

I really want to make sure I actually get my photos, any advice?source ↗

My fiancé isn’t too happy and doesn’t want to cancel but I’m not sure of how exactly to go about the situation.source ↗

Balitography · r/weddingplanning
r/MechanicAdvice1 person · September 2026

The question is this: would I be the a**hole if I cancelled with my regular shop and went with the other place?source ↗

They haven’t started the job, but do have the parts ordered. I assume they can returned the parts? I’d like to keep a good relationship with my normal shop. What should I do?source ↗

idontwantaname123456 · r/MechanicAdvice

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised