Said It Here

How to handle teenage manipulation and disrespect

Teens often use emotional threats, condescension, and dramatics to test boundaries and get their way. This leaves parents feeling hurt, dismissed, and unsure how to respond without making the conflict worse.

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

  1. 1
    ignoring the manipulation
  2. 2
    letting them argue without intervening
  3. 3
    Reading parenting and adolescent psychology books like Untangled
  4. 4
    Finding quiet moments of connection like going to the movies
  5. 5
    Communicating openly and asking if parents inadvertently caused hurt
  6. 6
    Reframing teenage behavior as big toddler emotions requiring patience and grace

In their words

Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.

My son (17) just told me that if I put up cameras in the living room that he will never see me again when he turns 18.source ↗

He tries to manipulate me to get his way and acts like he’s being mistreated when he absolutely is not. I’m kind of at a loss.source ↗

I_caught_the_crazy · r/Parenting · 6 upvotes

In the last year or two though, she has been disrespectful to my wife - her mom, (and me occasionally) more and more.source ↗

It’s more condescension, dismissiveness, taking us for granted, being distant, etc.source ↗

It seems like she treats his family better than us lately, which may be the most hurtful thing.source ↗

I guess I just want to know how others handle this behavior?source ↗

FlatButtFrankie · r/Parenting · 2 upvotes

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised