Should I let my child quit their activity?
Deciding whether to push through a setback or let a child quit leaves parents trapped between guilt over forcing them and fear of teaching them to give up too easily. This uncertainty makes it agonizing to figure out whether an activity has become genuinely harmful, such as causing panic or distress, or just requires more persistence.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
- 1Talking through challenges with instructors
- 2Setting a rule that they cannot quit unless they replace it with another non-screen hobby
- 3Practicing together at home to build confidence and overcome hurdles
- 4Taking a break from lessons and swimming as a family instead
- 5Switching to a different teacher or private one-on-one lessons
- 6Pushing through the difficulty until basic safety skills are mastered
- 7Pulling children out of travel sports entirely
- 8Considering homeschooling to manage the schedule
- 9allowing the child to quit sports and focus on theater or dance instead
- 10maintaining personal fitness and physical activity routines like yoga and school gym class rather than joining team sports
In their words
Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.
“I have had it with travel sports any my kids aren’t even 10. Is there going back?”source ↗
“We have missed vacations, staying up late on Fridays (early Saturday games), parties, etc.”source ↗
“I guess this week I finally had it. 4 soccer practices, 3 basketball practices, 3 soccer games, and two basketball games (for child 1).”source ↗
“She really doesn't like swimming lessons, but is it time to stop, or just push through?”source ↗
“I feel like I am failing him by not letting him give up, but I feel like I will also be failing him by letting him quit.”source ↗
“Am I doing the wrong thing by encouraging him to keep at it? Am I forcing him or encouraging him at this point? I just dont know what to do anymore”source ↗
“Thanks for the reply! We stopped for 3 months because of summer break, and now she is very scared about starting again, I am worrried she might cry during class.”source ↗
“I stopped lessons for my 6-year-old because she was getting worse and not better in the water. Towards the end she was even experiencing panicking behavior.”source ↗
“At what point do you let them give up on a sport?”source ↗
“Early teen has tried several sports and always quits after the minimum month we require. She’s miserable until then and then is happy when she stops. Do we keep trying?”source ↗
“She always gets really sad and begs to be let out. I ask her to stay at least a month. She does and then promptly quits and is bubbly again.”source ↗
“She says she’s miserable because she can’t breathe for most of practice and she never wants to go back again.”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 3Should I keep going with my stagnating business or quit?
- 2Non-religious parent whose kid wants to go to church
- 2Do youth sports get cancelled for heavy rain?
- 3Why does my kid beg to join activities and then fight going?
- 2How to switch schools in the middle of the school year
- 3How to handle after school meltdowns from an overtired child who won't nap