How to get kids to clean up toys without fighting
Broad commands like "put your toys away" leave children staring at a chaotic room of mixed blocks, books, and pieces, which makes them feel overwhelmed and try to bail. This ambiguity leads to avoidance tactics like hiding in the bathroom or faking injuries, leaving parents frustrated and doing the work themselves.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
Found another way around this?
Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.
- 1Breaking down instructions into a single task at a timeDid this help you?
- 2Turning cleanup time into a game with music or themesDid this help you?
- 3Helping alongside the child and modeling the cleaning processDid this help you?
- 4Doing a daily five-minute family chore timeDid this help you?
- 5Enforcing strict routines before breakfast like making the bed and folding pajamasDid this help you?
- 6Doing the task for the child when they ask for helpDid this help you?
- 7Throwing all toy clutter into garbage bags and hiding it in the garage or a closed roomDid this help you?
- 8Focusing only on basic hygiene in essential rooms like the bathroom and kitchen while ignoring toy clutterDid this help you?
- 9Setting a timer every 30 minutes and forcing kids to pick up the toys they were just playing withDid this help you?
- 10Decluttering the home to keep fewer toys aroundDid this help you?
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“The kids go from room to room, dumping out boxes of toys, books, anything.”source ↗
“I just feel humiliated by my home and my inability to keep on top of things.”source ↗
“TLDR I’m triggered by my filthy house right now and feel so inadequate.”source ↗
“I keep saying "put your toys away" when there are blocks, books, and pieces from different things all over the room. Then I get frustrated that he hasn't started, even though I haven't really told him where to start.”source ↗
“My 11 and 6 year olds still try the same thing. 11 year old conveniently finds her way into the bathroom whenever the topic comes up and my 6 year old likes to come up with an injury to an appendage that prevents him from cleaning.”source ↗
“It’s pretty overwhelming for them to see all of the stuff they need to clean up so they try to bail.”source ↗
Where this came up
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