Subtle ways to share they/them pronouns at a new school
Finding subtle, professional ways to share pronouns helps avoid unwanted attention while still letting coworkers and students know how to address you. However, presenting with one gender presentation while using different pronouns can create a disconnect that invites questions from students and parents, making it difficult to keep your personal life private as a new teacher.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
- 1Putting pronouns in the email signature
- 2Adding pronouns to the school LMS profile
- 3Displaying a name placard by the classroom door
- 4Wearing fun shirts with example sentences containing pronouns
- 5Using a pronoun pin
- 6Using a gender-neutral prefix like Mx.
- 7Going by last name only (e.g., 'Teacher [Name]')
- 8Choosing a traditional title that aligns strictly with physical presentation
- 9Moving to solidly blue areas or unionized districts
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“Presenting femme and wanting to be referred to by masc pronouns is going to create a disconnect in your students minds (and in turn their parents minds…) and as a brand new teacher you want as few questions about you and your personal life as possible.”source ↗
“I would love for my coworkers (and eventually students) to know that I use they/them pronouns.”source ↗
“What are some less “holding a sign and shouting” ways to show what I like to be called?”source ↗
“the question that’s been plaguing me is “what should my students call me?” I want to be a Mr. but will I be safe to do so?”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 2How to handle a new teacher who is trying to take over
- 5How do I know what my job actually is with no communication?
- 2When is the right time to announce a pregnancy at work?
- 2How to set boundaries with a work friend who is demanding HR info
- 3How to word an unconventional dress code on an invitation
- 3Coworker taking credit for my work