How to set up a daycare playdate when you never see the parents
When drop-off and pick-up schedules never overlap, parents are left wondering how to initiate contact without feeling awkward, such as leaving a note in a cubby. This lack of in-person contact makes it hard to get past polite small talk and arrange playdates or birthday parties.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
Found another way around this?
Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.
- 1Leaving a physical note or card in the child's cubbyDid this help you?
- 2Asking the daycare teacher to pass along a note or textDid this help you?
- 3Leaving it alone and letting friendships develop naturallyDid this help you?
- 4Making more of an effort to initiate interactionsDid this help you?
- 5Setting up a small group chat or playdate group to make things easierDid this help you?
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“Would it be weird to leave a note in their daughter’s cubby? What if I left a bday party invite (when it comes time for my daughter’s second bday)?”source ↗
“I’ve noticed I’m having a hard time getting beyond the polite small talk with some of the daycare moms.”source ↗
“I’m finding there’s very little effort or initiation from the other side.”source ↗
“birthday parties can sometimes feel like two hours of standing around feeling a bit sidelined”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 14How to help a shy child make friends
- 2How to do birthday party invites and RSVPs for middle schoolers
- 9How to handle anxiety about your baby crying at daycare transition
- 8How to set up playdates when you're too busy and don't know other parents
- 4Strangers taking pictures and passing notes to my child
- 14What to do when your child is excluded by a friend