Said It Here

How to set up a daycare playdate when you never see the parents

When drop-off and pick-up schedules never overlap, parents are left wondering how to initiate contact without feeling awkward, such as leaving a note in a cubby. This lack of in-person contact makes it hard to get past polite small talk and arrange playdates or birthday parties.

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

  1. 1
    Leaving a physical note or card in the child's cubby
  2. 2
    Asking the daycare teacher to pass along a note or text
  3. 3
    Leaving it alone and letting friendships develop naturally
  4. 4
    Making more of an effort to initiate interactions
  5. 5
    Setting up a small group chat or playdate group to make things easier

In their words

Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.

r/Parenting2 people · September 2026

Would it be weird to leave a note in their daughter’s cubby? What if I left a bday party invite (when it comes time for my daughter’s second bday)?source ↗

trox23 · r/Parenting · 6 upvotes

I’ve noticed I’m having a hard time getting beyond the polite small talk with some of the daycare moms.source ↗

I’m finding there’s very little effort or initiation from the other side.source ↗

birthday parties can sometimes feel like two hours of standing around feeling a bit sidelinedsource ↗

simmiiee · r/Parenting · 3 upvotes

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised