Why does my child say they hate everything they love?
Children often go through phases of rejecting familiar favorites by reflexively declaring they dislike things they usually enjoy. Hearing this constant negativity wears parents down emotionally, turning routine moments into exhausting power struggles.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
- 1responding neutrally with phrases like okay, cool or bummer
- 2calling out the behavior with humor or sarcasm
- 3reinforcing boundaries while letting them know they do not have to like everything
- 4Continuing to flag the spouse's tone in real-time rather than intervening during a direct argument
- 5Allowing the spouse to deal with the natural consequences of their behavior
- 6Talking to the child about respectful behavior while encouraging minimal interaction between them
- 7Asking the child to leave the house
- 8Charging a small amount of rent
- 9Setting up a formal list of house rules with a 30-day notice
- 10Treating them strictly as a tenant requiring market-rate rent
- 11Approaching behavior like training a puppy and using a firm 'no, try again'
- 12Refusing to engage with disrespectful language by saying 'I only listen to nice words'
- 13Calling out the behavior directly by asking if that is how communication will be going forward
- 14scolding the child
- 15guilt tripping the child about ruining a good mood
- 16lecturing the child about listening to the other parent
- 17ignoring the bad mood and staying out of it
In their words
Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.
“Lo and behold, she has started talking to my wife in the same tone. My wife is telling me to “back her up.” I’m like babe, you’ve talked to her like this for 5 years. This is all she knows now.”source ↗
“our 8 year old has started doing this to things we know he loves”source ↗
“in the last few months she has been saying “I don’t like this” to EVERYTHING. Even things I KNOW she likes.”source ↗
“hearing “I don’t like this” over and over is exhausting.”source ↗
“Lately, he has become very disrespectful, and it feels like I can’t even have a conversation with him without getting an aggressive response.”source ↗
“He also refuses to follow the rules and expectations we have in our home.”source ↗
“I’m not sure what else I can say or do at this point. I just feel guilty and constantly question whether I’m doing the right thing as a parent.”source ↗
“How do I deal with a grumpy teenage daughter who’s constantly snappy, rude, and insulting toward me. and only me, not her mum or anyone else in the family?”source ↗
“Am I not allowed to have feelings about it? Am I just supposed to get over it straight away?”source ↗
“I should have nipped this years ago but didn’t. Each time I gave in when my wife would say I’m not being a united front. But I’m tired of the way she talks to our daughter.”source ↗
“I have said things like that to my wife. She comes back with “she’s completely disrespectful to me and you allow it.””source ↗
“My sister does the same to all her kids, and now that they're getting older, she's constantly asking why they're so disrespectful to her and where is this behavior coming from.”source ↗
“he only sleep 2-3 hrs then he has to go to work or wake up to do chores I become the bad person which is not ok because he is usually angry, has an attitude and start cursing at everyone”source ↗
“Should I be sad about this or should I be brushing it off as "meh... shes a 7 year old." And the main issue... How do you parent this?”source ↗
“Today she got up, put her stuff on and went and faced the door with her back to me.”source ↗
“She said nothing. She usually gets up in the back seat getting her backpack on getting ready to get out and gives me a hug and a kiss on the cheek and tells me how much she loves me.”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 2Why does my child get angry when I praise them?
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- 6How to handle biting and hitting in toddlers
- 6Why does my child behave at school but act out at home?
- 13How to handle disrespectful student micro-aggressions and boundary-crossing
- 11How to cope with a constantly talking, high-energy child