Is it legal for interviewers to ask about family planning or kids?
Employers sometimes cross legal lines by probing about marriage, children, or future pregnancy intentions to gauge employee retention. These invasive questions force applicants to choose between revealing personal life details or withdrawing from consideration out of discomfort.
What the numbers show
Counted from the threads quoted below. How we count
- People have been saying this in most months since June 2026.
- This comes up 301.9× more often in r/freelance than across the site as a whole.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
Found another way around this?
Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.
- 1Reporting the interviewer to the EEOC or a state civil rights agency2 people mentionedDid this help you?
- 2Withdrawing from consideration for the jobDid this help you?
- 3Leaving a factual review on platforms like Glassdoor or IndeedDid this help you?
- 4Notifying organizational leadership, the Executive Director, or the Board of DirectorsDid this help you?
- 5Refusing to answer and setting boundariesDid this help you?
- 6Cutting the interview shortDid this help you?
- 7Dropping or declining the clientDid this help you?
- 8Hiding caregiving responsibilities entirely during the interview processDid this help you?
- 9Asking about flexibility in the vaguest way possible with a cheerful toneDid this help you?
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“During the interview, the interviewer went on and on about how they've had to keep hiring to fill this specific role because one of their previous employees left after a few years, and then another went on maternity leave and ended up not returning. They then went on to say, "You're not planning to get pregnant and leave, right? We reward people who stick around for the long haul."”source ↗
“To state the obvious, this made me feel super icky and I took myself out of consideration for the role. This is the first (and hopefully only) time something like this has ever happened to me (mid 20s woman) in the workplace, but it feels kind of illegal to ask that, right?”source ↗
“I had a freelance interview where the interviewer asked if I was married.”source ↗
“I got a call yesterday from an HR representative. He asked if I was married, and I said yes. Then he asked if I had any kids.”source ↗
“I had someone ask my age….so annoying.”source ↗
“During the interview process, I’m not sure how up front to be about my situation.”source ↗
“I think I’ve earned the right and paid my dues enough to be somewhat blunt about my situation so I’m more confident that I’m getting into a company that is supportive.”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 9Why do recruiters ghost and waste time during a job search?
- 4Did I ruin a job interview by saying something stupid?
- 3Can you get your kid an internship at your spouse's company?
- 7Why are there so many surprise questions on professional exams?
- 2Dealing with insensitive questions about having a baby at 40
- 2How to deal with the awkwardness of volunteering after a job rejection