Bridesmaids ignoring texts and not getting their dresses
Bridal party members fail to respond to messages or try on their dresses right before the wedding date. This leaves brides panicked and forced to order backup dresses themselves to ensure the color scheme matches.
What the numbers show
Counted from the threads quoted below. How we count
- People have been saying this in most months since September 2026.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
Found another way around this?
Share your steps and trade-offs so fellow engineers don't have to reinvent the wheel. No account required.
- 1Panic ordering multiple backup dresses to ensure the color scheme matchesDid this help you?
- 2Repeatedly checking in and messaging the personDid this help you?
- 3having the bridesmaid follow the lead of others on the big dayDid this help you?
- 4having someone record the rehearsal so the missing person can catch upDid this help you?
- 5cutting the wedding party member some slack and accepting late arrivalDid this help you?
- 6Reaching out directly to the coordinator or her bossDid this help you?
- 7Gathering timeline information independently to share with other vendorsDid this help you?
- 8Assuming the guest is not coming and sending a short, polite message that avoids pressing for an RSVP.Did this help you?
- 9Following up with the unresponsive guest using a standard reminder script about catering deadlines.Did this help you?
- 10Assuming the guest is not attending based on hints and avoiding askingDid this help you?
- 11Sending a gentle, low-pressure text message to check in before finalizing vendor numbersDid this help you?
- 12Having the fiancé communicate with the bridesmaid insteadDid this help you?
- 13Checking in from a place of concern rather than confronting them about the missed tripDid this help you?
- 14Letting time pass to calm down emotional reactions before addressing the issueDid this help you?
- 15Sending a final deadline warning message stating that unreturned RSVPs will be marked as a 'No'Did this help you?
- 16Dividing and conquering by having parents check in with family members and friends who haven't respondedDid this help you?
- 17Manually chasing down individual guests with direct follow-up messagesDid this help you?
- 18Skipping the wedding party entirelyDid this help you?
- 19Hiring a professional wedding planner or day-of coordinator to handle the heavy liftingDid this help you?
- 20Using siblings or family members instead of friendsDid this help you?
In their words
Unedited, grouped by where they were said, most upvoted first within each place, each linked to the thread it came from.
“Our deadline came, reminders were sent, and these are the numbers: 140 Yes 49 No 110 No Response”source ↗
“Is this normal? Lol the amount of no responses is so amazing to me but i didn't know what to expect. I just feel a little weird about it 😅”source ↗
“I’m feeling really awkward about following up with her.”source ↗
“I’m now just more than a month out and it’s been crickets from the coordinator on things like timelines and floor plan layout, etc.”source ↗
“At this point the mandated planner/coordinator (who comes with her own hefty fee) has been so unhelpful I want to just pay the fee and ask her not to show up.”source ↗
“I had a job where my boss was a horrible person and wouldn't let anyone take a part day.”source ↗
“I know sometimes with my work, I can put in a request into the system and talk to the scheduler multiple times and get told they will, "Look into it" and then when the schedule finally comes out two weeks before said event, they've denied my request and scheduled me during the time I requested off.”source ↗
“I was once the MANAGER of a Retail Store, planned my Best Friends Baby Shower for months and the Perfect Storm of circumstances happened and I could only briefly attend and had to go back to work.”source ↗
“Every single one of my vendors has reached out to me asking for timeline info because evidently she isn’t responding to them either.”source ↗
“The venue owners are super uninvolved in the day to day process is my understanding so I’m not sure reaching out like someone else mentioned would even be worth it.”source ↗
“My friend didn't rsvp, and I planned to ask her when we met up yesterday, but I got the hint she isn't going.”source ↗
“Is it safe to assume she isn't going? It felt it was strongly implied so I didn't want to make our night awkward by asking.”source ↗
“I got nervous!!! And just felt it was implied 😭”source ↗
“it’s a lot of responsibility and if the rest of the wedding party is clueless, it’s like hurdling cats. My own sister was most of the problem too.”source ↗
“It can be embarrassing to be seen as lacking friends, lacking family, etc. You have to do what’s going to make you feel best!”source ↗
“I’m now two weeks out from wedding date and she ignored my texts for weeks asking if she has a dress. I panic ordered two dresses for her because I was worried it wouldn’t match the color scheme.”source ↗
“One of them arrived 4 days ago and she still hasn’t tried it on 😭 I asked her to two days ago and she said she would yesterday and when I checked in again she left on read.”source ↗
“Am I crazy or is that rude and am I right to be annoyed? UGH”source ↗
“This past weekend was my Bachelorette trip and while it was great, this one thing continues to bother me.”source ↗
“But what hurts is that there was no text or call or acknowledgement from Lisa herself telling me she wouldn't be there.”source ↗
“Should I say something to this bridesmaid? I don't want to ruffle feathers as she is someone who will always be in the family, not just a friend or acquaintance, but I am a bit hurt by the nonexistent communication.”source ↗
“My flakey group of friends has been going through major drama last year and I feel almost like I don’t want them in my wedding due to so many stressful dramatic events.”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 6What to do when your wedding planner goes silent
- 4How to schedule wedding dances without boring the guests
- 4How to stop someone from inviting themselves to your wedding
- 8What to do when a wedding guest's plus-one behaves offensively
- 10Friends giving terrible excuses to skip my wedding
- 12What to do when your best friend won't come to your wedding