How is anyone actually affording a large wedding?
Venues and vendors charge unexpectedly high and predatory prices that overwhelm couples with financial anxiety. This leaves people wondering how anyone can afford their dream wedding without going into debt or relying on family help, often making them want to abandon the plans entirely to elope.
What people tried
Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.
- 1Saving money aggressively over several years
- 2Getting financial help or contributions from parents
- 3Taking out 0% interest payment plans or going into debt
- 4Reducing the guest list or having a destination wedding
- 5Choosing non-traditional or off-season venues
- 6DIYing decor and hiring newer or less expensive vendors
- 7Looking at regional subreddits for cost breakdowns and spreadsheets
- 8Asking the caterer to upgrade food and drinks or add extras to meet the minimum spend instead of paying for empty seats
- 9Choosing three core priorities with a partner and treating everything else as a minor detail
- 10Selling items after the wedding to recoup costs and stay under budget
- 11Having basic drinks and a cash bar instead of an open bar
- 12Serving simpler food like pizza and cake instead of multi-course meals and snacks
- 13Choosing a wedding location closer to home despite travel inconvenience for guests
- 14Choosing all-inclusive venues or hotel ballrooms instead of aesthetic standalone venues
- 15Renting items from third-party rental companies
- 16DIYing decor items like seating charts instead of hiring vendors
- 17Choosing to elope due to high costs
In their words
Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.
“You will go over budget, as long as you dont go into debt i think youre doing great and ITS NORMAL.”source ↗
“Things come up that you dont expect (even if you think you account for everything like me)”source ↗
“Genuinely….the wedding industry I knew was expensive, but some of this stuff is just straight up predatory.”source ↗
“It’s just very overwhelming, it gives me financial anxiety and even though we both have this vision for our reception it makes me want to just say fuck all of this, book a flight out to a tropical country and elope.”source ↗
“I guess my question is: how is anyone affording the wedding of their dreams or anything close to it?”source ↗
“Catering 140 for only 101 confirmed guests 😭 I’ve now learned that you tell them the least amount then you add on top later!!”source ↗
“we forgot to even budget for our honeymoon! We thought it would be really special to travel straight after our wedding. I don’t want to save up again for our honeymoon.”source ↗
“I feel like all the regrets are hitting me hard now”source ↗
“i’ve been starting to look at venues and vendors for our wedding, and i’m realizing pretty quickly that there’s a huge range in what things can cost.”source ↗
“i’m trying to compare the bigger categories first, like venue and catering, photography, music, flowers, attire and everything else that tends to get added along the way.”source ↗
“Open bars are insanely expensive.”source ↗
“How about just pizza and cake? Why tf is it turning into Thanksgiving?”source ↗
“I switched to a smaller venue that is very cute aesthetically, and this venue (like many others) is insane with their pricing/business structure.”source ↗
“It should not cost me an arm and a leg to want to put your table runners that I know YOU HAVE. I'm already paying up the wazoo type of money to just have your venue and rent the facility out.”source ↗
“Oh, we have these beautiful glass charger plates, but that'll be extra charge on top of the thousands of dollars!!!”source ↗
Where this came up
People with this problem also raised
- 2Why are weddings so ridiculously expensive?
- 2Is a holiday weekend wedding a bad idea for guests?
- 6Is it safe to get expensive dental work done abroad?
- 13How to pay for large emergency expenses without using credit
- 7How to handle family demanding to pay for wedding beauty and expenses
- 12How to pay for expensive structural property repairs