Said It Here

Why does my baby prefer everyone else over me?

Babies and toddlers frequently go through phases of attachment where they show clear favoritism toward other family members, caregivers, or even casual helpers over a parent. This favoritism causes intense emotional pain and a deep sense of personal rejection for the parent who ranks last in the child's daily preferences.

What people tried

Every workaround mentioned in the threads below. We haven’t tested any of them — and nobody here is claiming they worked.

  1. 1
    spending more time with the child
  2. 2
    reworking schedules to be more involved
  3. 3
    trying to be okay with not always being number one
  4. 4
    creating memories and fun experiences in free time
  5. 5
    Taking short outings away from the baby like walks, gym visits, supermarkets, or the salon.

In their words

Unedited, most upvoted first, each linked to the thread it came from.

I rank last. And it hurts.source ↗

MoonlitNightRain · r/Parenting · 4 upvotes

Baby doesn’t seem to like being held by me (aka mom). She cries and tries to kick away.source ↗

It’s to the point where I get anxiety when I’m alone with her because I’m afraid she’s gonna rage when I try to calm her and get her to sleep.source ↗

I’m a FTM and I feel like I don’t know what I’m doingsource ↗

toebeanaficionado · r/Parenting · 4 upvotes

I have started to notice recently she does not smile at me or get excited at my sight like she would usually do for everyone else. This makes me a bit upset and I feel like she is not as fond of me maybesource ↗

UpbeatDance6842 · r/Parenting · 2 upvotes

It stings a bit since I never had this happen with my other 3 childrensource ↗

valentinaa2002 · r/Parenting · 1 upvotes

I guess it hurts when even a hired help, who isn’t even his nanny rank above me.source ↗

MoonlitNightRain · r/Parenting · 1 upvotes

Where this came up

People with this problem also raised